I met a guy at the bar the other night, we drank, we talked, and he got my number one, normal routine. I will admit that I am not really, but I would have given him a chance. I figured if he sent me I would be available to date. Well, the next day is spinning and nothing. At that moment, thoughts raced through my head.
He chased after me, so what to give? Why get my number if you don’t use it? And why am I wasting my time thinking about a guy I like?
I eventually dropped out that if he liked me enough, he would have contacted me. I put it in my mind as one-of-a-kind and moved on. He popped up in my thoughts now and then for the next few days, but I was more confused than I wished he had kept me. Fast forward to just two weeks later and he has completely forgotten when, what do you know, he writes me. I couldn’t believe it. Two weeks later? Are you kidding me? She really thinks the offer is still up after two weeks, and what kind of girl does she think I am to hold on for so long? In fact, I did not shy away from the phone (from my dignity and self-respect), however I was shocked. Maybe I’m just an adult, but it’s amazing to me that people are comfortable communicating a happy feeling two weeks from the next meeting. And maybe when they get frustrated and everything else fails. I refuse to be an afterthought.
I introduced it to my friends and they agreed and shared it. We are confused right now and are paying attention to dating. Some are “ghosted” (suddenly suppressing all communication with someone you know) and some agree with the ghost. Most of us complain that no one wants to do it, and others say they don’t want a relationship. Most of the time we experiment until the next person decides to leave. All of us are hanging on to a script that may or may not come along and hang out with the intentions that are not just about sex. How did this come about and why is this so?
My burden on modern advertising is to allow our standards in dating to be very low. How can our intentions be just a text, or a drink in a bar, or three pieces of gear? Aziz Ansari in his book Modern Romance (which you should read) said,
“… being asked through a text message has made it impossible to give women that sense of sarcasm.”
The days of justifying someone are decreasing. This generation and future generations will never have that worry, but the satisfaction of calling them crushed on their cell phones and praying for them to pick up instead of their dad. Rarely, will you ever climb back to your front door. And the flowers are certainly not expected on the first day.
The truth is that we have become lazy. We are afraid to ask for what we want, what we need, when it comes to love. The lavatories we repeated over and over again, out of respect, did not really express our feelings. People are not showing respect to face-to-face contact, but instead are hiding and hiding behind their phones. No one wants to be abused and work for what they want. There is something that can be said about instant gratification that holds in our eating habits. The things that are worth your time and effort, just like relationships and love, are not accomplished through half the heart and awareness. People die in the name of love, but today we run away because we don’t know the truth.
In order to change, we need more. Accepting a word pass or a couple drinking at the bar should not be the norm. We should be more considerate of ourselves and others, especially of their feelings. No one should be left without comment or goodbye. Everyone should be careful about their feelings and expectations, as it not only saves time and heartache, but leads to a healthier life. So next time, call someone and ask her out on a date, it’s a real date. Be respectful and don’t expect anything in return (a kiss, sex, whatever), because they gave you their time and are holy within. And if you like them a lot, tell them, and if you don’t like them, tell god, tell them. Learn what you need and don’t do, and don’t accept it